Love the 4 points by D. M. Ruiz below, especially the “Don’t Take Anything Personally” rule!! Personalization is a huge maladaptive thought pattern that is all too common. If one never becomes aware of socialized habits of personalization, not only when and what others are projecting onto us, but also our own patterns of projecting our subjective repressed emotions onto everyone we interact with, I strongly believe that self-liberation can never be reached. Additionally, even if you’re not that into observing energy fields, just imagine the type of energy you permit out into your environment, and what you attract back when functioning from a stance of personalization, unaware projections and repressed emotions. No fun to say the least … and if you’re a big externalizer, I can just imagine how exhausting many interactions must become for you!
Yet, talk about self-liberation … as soon as one realizes just how irrelevant the opinions and mind-chatter of others are, so much needless worry & assumptions can be let go of, and your energy can be better spent focused elsewhere on manifesting something so much more fruitful and prosperous!! As I’ve been saying since 2008 began (and just in time since it’s a political year) people truly are worth so much more than just their opinions. Think about it … is the core essence of who individuals are defined by their thoughts (which are always subject to change based on life exps/exposure), or are you capable of seeing others (in addition to yourself) separate from their opinions/thoughts? Are you able to see within yourself and others all the various unique components that make up who you/they are in your/their totality?
Yet, talk about self-liberation … as soon as one realizes just how irrelevant the opinions and mind-chatter of others are, so much needless worry & assumptions can be let go of, and your energy can be better spent focused elsewhere on manifesting something so much more fruitful and prosperous!! As I’ve been saying since 2008 began (and just in time since it’s a political year) people truly are worth so much more than just their opinions. Think about it … is the core essence of who individuals are defined by their thoughts (which are always subject to change based on life exps/exposure), or are you capable of seeing others (in addition to yourself) separate from their opinions/thoughts? Are you able to see within yourself and others all the various unique components that make up who you/they are in your/their totality?
by Don Miguel Ruiz
According to Don Miguel Ruiz, everything we do is based on agreements we have made—agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, with life. But the most important agreements are the ones we make with ourselves. In these agreements we tell ourselves who we are, how to behave, what is possible, what is impossible. One single agreement is not such a problem, but we have many agreements that come from fear, deplete our energy, and diminish our self-worth.
In The Four Agreements, Don Miguel reveals the source of self-limiting agreements that rob us of joy and create needless suffering. When we are ready to change these agreements, there are four deceptively simple, yet powerful agreements that we can adopt as guiding principles. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, The Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom, true happiness, and love.
The Four Agreements are:
BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD.Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the of truth and love.
**Note for all you gossip lovers out there: Gossip is a way of avoiding confrontation and a great example of how we break our integrity with ourselves. If gossiping about others makes you feel powerful, perhaps you should look at why you feel powerless. When you gossip and feel badly about yourself afterwards, you're betraying yourself.
DON'T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY.Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS.Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST.Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are tired as opposed to well-rested. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.The Four Agreements sound simple, even simplistic. But try keeping just one for an entire day!
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